cooking school — day 6 — MEAAAAAT

19 Sep

God. Cooking meat, real meat meat, not the chickens THAT I LOVE but just aren’t…I dunno…meat…you know what I’m saying….I don’t even know what I’m saying, is just so….coooooool. It’s a feeling of intense pride that I just don’t get from roasting a chicken, ok??? Perhaps because it’s kind of foreign to me in my little home kitchen. Something I am just used to ordering at fawn-cy restaurants, done by real chefs. Now, when I’m sitting around, brainstorming dinner, my thoughts won’t just automatically go to another way to season chicken or marinate a steak. It goes to porkchops, crusted lamb, steak au poivre. And whatever else these people are willing to teach me. And not just because I want to “challenge” myself (I do that sometimes with difficult, tedious cookbooks…the ones where every ingredient is a recipe from a different page and makes you want to shoot yourself in the face). Truth is, NONE of these were a challenge at all.

So awesome.

Pork chops brined overnight in a salty bath of sugar, whole green chillies, peppercorns, red pepper flakes, lemon, lemon zest….

One of my favorite things I learned? Put it on the hot, oiled grill (nicely, for those cross hatches) (2 mins each side) (don’t have a recipe) and DO NOT FUCK WITH IT. This is the time to seal alllll that juice in by just cooking the outside. I am so used to just…fucking with things. Peeking, moving things. Removing to temp check. But no. Just trust your gut. Don’t. Fuck with it. There is always the oven post-grilling, and it actually makes me feel more chef-y to finish things there.

And oh, LET IT REST. AKA don’t cut it. AKA don’t. fuck with it. When you cut it too quickly, like I did in the early days, alllll that wonderful juice spills onto your board. That is juice that should be in your belly and only your belly. The board doesn’t deserve that shit! Your belly does.

PS. Did you know that you no longer have to cook the shit out of pork? I mean don’t let it be soft and pink, but don’t be scared to have the thing not be a solid white all the way through. Trichinosis is no longer a huge worry. But if you get it after reading this, this sentence never happened and best of luck to you.

Steak au poivre. Pepper steak. Heavily season a filet (or whatever, because really any cut of beef is better than a freakin filet I NEED BONNNNE AND FAT) with salt and freshly ground pepper.

Place onto a lightly oiled (canola, preferably! canola is a high heat oil…i just learned that olive oil is not at all for high-heat cooking. such a simple freaking thing to know and yet I did not know it) and watch it smoke. Go ahead and stick your face into the smoke and inhale if you want to have the most intense sneeze orgasm of your life. Cook to your liking. If your liking is to cook it to well-done, then go ahead and do that and throw it into a raging fire along with your wallet and clothing since you just ruined a piece of meat and have no taste at all what it’s true I’m sorry dad.

On a nice little peppercorn sauce. Although it included my loves onions and dijon, the cognac ruined it for me. I freaking hate the flavor of cognac. The feeling? The feeling I like.

Hot pan. Lightly oiled. Simple salt and pepper on frenched lamb. Cooked until a nice sear appears.

Like so.

This is Ina’s “Rack of Lamb Parsillade”, if you want to look it up. She doesn’t use dijon like we did, but a cool thing to know is that hey, if you love it, try it! We spread dijon on the top, stuck the herb / breadcrumb mixture to it (I actually replaced the bread crumbs with finely grated parmesan to attempt me “low-ER carb” thing) and popped it into the oven.

Then get raunchy with your instructor. I actually am incapable of squatting down to check the oven right now, as my thighs are seriously KILLING me from Physique 57 (need to get back into swimsuit mode wahhhhhhhhhhhhh). I actually have to get on all fours to look. It’s very professional.

Let rest. Don’t. Fuck with it. (will now be known as D.FWI). Slice.

Time to go to school now :) Morrrrrre to come. xx!!

52 Responses to “cooking school — day 6 — MEAAAAAT”

  1. Erica R September 19, 2012 at 9:04 am #

    MEAT. Now I totally want a porkchop with a side of steak for breakfast!

  2. Izzie September 19, 2012 at 9:05 am #

    Although I’m too lazy and poor to cook this cool stuff, this is so interesting!!! Thanks for sharing. I died at the part about catching trinchosis or whatever the hell it’s called. Well not died, death by pigs would suck. But you know what I mean.

    • Dea September 20, 2012 at 10:36 am #

      *haha* “death by pigs” – that sounds so funny!

  3. Allan September 19, 2012 at 9:06 am #

    Thanks for sharing, Miss Teigen. Would you recommend cooking steaks on a cast iron skillet, grill or broiler?

  4. Sidney September 19, 2012 at 9:09 am #

    Everything looks delish. Love your hysterical commentary. Enjoy!

  5. Martha September 19, 2012 at 9:11 am #

    Miss Teigen, I absolutely adoreeeee you!! Keep the blogs coming, I’ve missed you.

  6. Denise Miller (@IrieDame) September 19, 2012 at 9:16 am #

    You are making me consider going to cooking school. I think I am at that point in my cooking life where it would help me greatly. You have no idea how much of an inspiration you are.

  7. Tiffany September 19, 2012 at 9:28 am #

    Looks so good! Would love to go to cooking school. Love your blog, your very real and relatable.

  8. Rochelle September 19, 2012 at 9:29 am #

    I absolutely adore your blog, and as a vegetarian I really shouldn’t! Everything you post about just looks incredible, and I just love the way you write. So glad you’re posting again, I think you are hilarious, and I love adapting your recipes for vegetarian meals (I know you can’t stand vegetarian food!).
    Keep up the great work :)

  9. Melissa September 19, 2012 at 9:48 am #

    I’m so happy you are blogging again! I have always wanted to go to cooking school but with work there’s just not enough time so I am *thrilled* you are doing this and I can see firsthand (secondhand?) what it’s like. Learn a lot so I can steal some recipes. I also made the cake batter popcorn this weekend for a friends birthday, it was delish. In closing, CHIPOTLE MARINADE!

  10. itsmarky September 19, 2012 at 9:50 am #

    OK for a non US citizen whats canola oil corn oil? Interesting to note that should not high temp olive oil I did not know that. Tres helpful. These are the best cooking lessons would be perfect if you could please send over the food for me to eat too.

  11. ramie September 19, 2012 at 10:03 am #

    First time, long time. Looks amazing as always! Especially the lamb. One uber-nerdy comment. “Sealing in the juices” is not a thing. http://www.chow.com/food-news/55143/can-you-really-seal-the-juices-into-meat/ Can’t wait to see what’s next!

    Also, if you ever want help styling your blog, let me know.

  12. Emily September 19, 2012 at 10:04 am #

    Great tip re: olive/canola oil…thanks!

  13. Matthew September 19, 2012 at 10:05 am #

    You could play fuckin’ checkers on that pork chop!

  14. Natalie September 19, 2012 at 10:08 am #

    This is so awesome!!! I am soooo jealous of this experience that I could sooo not do. Can’t wait to see what else you have coming!

    xo
    Natalie

    DishesRunways&Briefcases.blogpost.com

  15. haleymarieg September 19, 2012 at 10:08 am #

    so great. i love LOVE love that you are in cooking school…and that you are so passionate about it! Always wanted to do that and maybe one day i still will. Tonight I will be putting up little notes in my kitchen EVERYWHERE saying “D.FWI” since its my 2nd favorite thing to do while cooking other than drinking wine…looking forward to seafood recipes and pics!

  16. Jesse September 19, 2012 at 10:50 am #

    Canola Oil is actually Rapeseed Oil but as you can imagine, products tend to avoid putting the word “rape” on their products. It was rebranded as Canola. This is not unlike how the Patagonian Toothfish wasn’t nearly as popular until they were rebranded as Chilean Seabass, or how Garth Brooks became Chris Gaines and grew a soul patch because, you know, it was 1999.

    • Jesse September 19, 2012 at 10:51 am #

      Whoops, that was supposed to be a Reply to itsMarky.

      • itsmarky September 19, 2012 at 11:39 am #

        grazi Jesse I was going the wrong way with my corn oil guess. Funnily enough all the chefs in UK are now saying rapeseed is better to use than olive oil (we seem happy with use of rape errr you know what I mean) generally.

  17. Jackie September 19, 2012 at 11:25 am #

    Thanks for the oil tip… Did not know that. Your a teacher and a student. Enjoy your daily posts!

  18. thedancingrunner September 19, 2012 at 11:51 am #

    Oh my sweet Lord that meat looks good! I like the your lulu headband :-)

  19. danielle September 19, 2012 at 12:39 pm #

    you are fucking hilarious. seriously laugh out loud. also thanks for being real and modely….. hmmm i imagine tons is in the works for the whole skinny chef model thing. if not call the food network!

  20. Ciara Robbins September 19, 2012 at 12:50 pm #

    Thank god you are blogging regularly again. Your posts make me excited to get in the kitchen. Now, you are making me want to go to culinary school. Do you get to visit a beef “harvesting” place? I went with work and it actually didn’t make me want to stop eating beef AT ALL. Keep posting lessons like this for those of us who don’t get to go to cooking school! Thanks!!

  21. Lacey September 19, 2012 at 1:01 pm #

    Can you recommend a good cooking school in NYC or somewhere to take classes? I’m a novice at best but I’ve been able to make your recipes without killing anyone. I’m so happy you’re blogging again.

  22. Thomas Crown September 19, 2012 at 2:12 pm #

    Any cut is better than a fillet? You’ve lost your mind…

  23. Erin September 19, 2012 at 3:46 pm #

    I love this! I always fuck with meat while I’m cooking so I will be repeating the mantra constantly. Thanks for the tips!

  24. elizabeth September 19, 2012 at 4:04 pm #

    I’m so glad you’re back to blogging!

  25. mbeckett5 September 19, 2012 at 4:12 pm #

    Ahhh your posts make me miss culinary school!! Don’t you LOVE the feeling of knowing how to do things the “right” way? I miss it so much but love re-living the experience through you!

    Although it looks like you don’t have to wear the god-awful beanie cap and black-and-white checked pants like I did. Damn you

  26. Meghan September 19, 2012 at 5:39 pm #

    I do P57 too! Every month I’m like, hey, maybe I should stop throwing so much cash at them and take a month off, and then I get terrified of the day I go back and Holly shoves my toes up farther and I dieeeeeeee (that happened this morning).

    Anyway, I love your cooking school posts! It’s like talking to someone and then you see their face light up when you get on a certain topic – it’s so clear how much you love it.

  27. coco September 19, 2012 at 6:17 pm #

    oooh welcome home!!! we missed you xxx

  28. cwebbie September 19, 2012 at 7:06 pm #

    So happy you’re blogging again and even happier you’re going after your dream! I remember your post about not feeling chef-y and I assured you you were the shit… or at least better than Racheal Ray. Can’t wait to see where this takes you. Blog much!

  29. Peter Kayaian September 19, 2012 at 7:25 pm #

    a good tip I learn from working in the industry for pork chops (besides brining them) is to score the fat on the side and after the initial sear. and before the first flip, turn the chop on its side and let it render for a minute or two. Doesnt hurt to baste with butter throughout either. The result is akin to rib eye cap like texture and taste

  30. Kristen Halbert September 19, 2012 at 9:21 pm #

    Too freaking beautiful. Sooooo hungry for meaty goodness…

  31. Michi September 20, 2012 at 12:22 am #

    i feel so proud of you for actually going to cooking school even though that’s a little creepy to say to someone you don’t know. but anyway i love your posts!!

  32. Kelly September 20, 2012 at 9:25 am #

    I think it’s great that your in cooking school….I love your blog and now I will learn even more about cooking through YOU! Yay!

  33. Shiney September 20, 2012 at 10:33 pm #

    The steak looks perfect. Who is taking all of these photos of you while you’re in class?

  34. Jaclyn September 21, 2012 at 12:49 am #

    I am beyond thrilled that you are doing the cooking school thing! And that you are blogging again.

  35. Sara September 21, 2012 at 1:25 am #

    Your posts make my day. You’re funny and insightful and I understand EXACTLY about the low carb necessity, cooking for my personal trainer boyfriend. All I want to do is make pastas with vodka sauces but grilled chicken seems to always win. Keep it up, I’m living vicariously through you!

  36. LG September 21, 2012 at 8:59 am #

    Chrissy don’t fail us now!!!! You were on such a good (two day) streak of actually doing a post per day. We need you!!!!!!

  37. SLS0 September 21, 2012 at 10:36 am #

    ***Gordon Ramsey Voice***
    That lamb is RAW in the middle!!

  38. Margaret September 26, 2012 at 7:55 pm #

    What happened to blogging on a daily basis??!?!?!? I LOVE reading your blog, do it more often!

  39. Monzinthecity September 28, 2012 at 10:39 pm #

    Amazing…

  40. Amber October 1, 2012 at 1:48 am #

    OMG you’re on Watch What Happens Live!
    work it, girl!
    Best of luck to you

  41. Alissa B October 1, 2012 at 11:22 pm #

    I just wanted to let you know that I think that you’re awesome. Whenever I quote something funny you said on here or your twitter and I have to explain who you are, I say “well, she’s a SI swimsuit model, but she’s fucking hilarious, and she writes this awesome food blog… basically she rocks” and then I get this disbelieving look and the girls are thinking “yeah right, lesbo” and the guys are thinking “yeah right, liar”… the moral of this story is that you’re amazing, keep doing what you’re doing! I come here as much for a laugh as I do for a new recipe.

  42. Tara October 1, 2012 at 11:58 pm #

    What is the name of the cooking school you are attending? It looks really exciting!

  43. Ami October 2, 2012 at 12:02 am #

    You’re absolutely amazing and hilarious. What do u read in your free time?? Other than food blogs..!

  44. Stacey Schneider October 2, 2012 at 9:16 am #

    Yay! you’re back! Just got all caught up. Congrats on your career transition! Go get ‘em, girl!

  45. Sarah B October 4, 2012 at 5:15 am #

    Just spent hours reading your blog, it’s 5:05 AM and have not slept yet because I CANT STOP it’s so funny and good!! And I went to culinary school too just graduating in April so this just reminds me of how much fun I had. The recipe’s you post are delish, and I also have an unhealthy infatuation with chipotle marinade or anything chipotle for that matter (chip hummus = fantastic). Thanks for making me laugh early on a Thursday morning and also thank you for being authentic? That word hardly exists anymore!!

    - Sarah, 22, Toronto

  46. Erica Wessbecker October 5, 2012 at 5:38 pm #

    Ah hadn’t been to your blog in a couple of months and just had so much fun reading all of your last posts. Thanks for continuing with your style of writing (which I would consider a rad rambling of authentic-ness?) :)

  47. Eric October 7, 2012 at 5:04 pm #

    Chrissy,
    I watched you and John on tv earlie in the AM, showing your nice place!

  48. ericasung October 8, 2012 at 11:11 pm #

    Chrissy! Check out my recipe for kalbi jjim. this is basically slow cooked korean short ribs, I think you will LOVE it :)

    http://eggyskitchen.wordpress.com/2012/10/09/kalbi-jjim-korean-braised-short-ribs/

  49. Kris July 19, 2013 at 6:00 am #

    naturally like your website but you need to check
    the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling issues
    and I find it very troublesome to tell the reality however I’ll certainly come again again.

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