Archive | 1:44 pm

Texas Country Potato Salad

18 May

Texas Country Potato Salad sounds weird together. Am I wrong here? I don’t like saying Texas Country. You are Texas State, don’t try to get out of being associated with us! Or is it “Texas *PAUSE* Country Potato Salad? Anyhow. Do I love the name? No. Do I LOVE THIS POTATO SALAD??? YES. DO I WANT TO MAKE THIS FOR EVERY SUMMERTIME BBQ I HAVE IN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS?? YES. AM I OVERLY EXCITED ABOUT THIS? NO BITCH! IT IS THAT GOOD!

What’s that? You wanted me to get more specific? Well okay bossy pants. See this photo? Those are little red potatoes. And those little red potatoes are swimming in a jacuzzi of seasoned water and BACON GREASE. You boil. These potatoes. In bacon grease.

I rest my case.

I LOVE potato salad. Although I must say, it’s kind of a forgotten food for me. I never think about it. I never say to myself, “Man, this dinner is good but it would be complete with…..potato salad.”

But I think I’m gonna start saying that now. My old thoughts of potato salad were that of the ones from fast food places. Perfectly diced potatoes. Plain, slightly watery sauce. This is ohhhh so different. Rustic. Rugged. Flavor country.

Bacon, eggs, red potatoes, green onion, mayo…….wait a minute. Yes okay it’s basically those deviled eggs having sex times with potatoes but hey, that’s a porn I would watch (celebrity sex tapes are always such snoozers) (yes I’ve watched and I know you do too) (leaked pictures too) (blake lively is really pretty) (okay this is getting creepy)


Smooth and creamy with pops of bacon and green onion. Just to die for. My low-carb diet arch nemesis, ladies and gentleman I present to you…

Paula Deen’s Texas Country Potato Salad

Bacon Deviled Eggs

18 May

Very few things please me as much as the egg.

Well, my dogs. My dogs make me happy. Then there’s John of course but whatever, easy answer. BACON makes me endlessly happy, as we all know. Though I am not loving the BACON EVERYTHING hipster train. EXCUSE ME THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE THAT LOVED BACON BEFORE IT WAS COOL. Ew actually that is something a hipster would say isn’t it. Okay I am the hipster and I do not appreciate people loving bacon because loving bacon is “cool”. Loving bacon is a serious thing!! You feel it in your soul. And later, your heart, when it inevitably explodes and shit.

Anyhow, since it’s not socially acceptable to make your dogs into deviled eggs (oh you’re soooo proper, america) I guess bacon deviled eggs are the next best thing.

And I’m not kidding about the “best thing” part. THESE ARE LITTLE EGGY BITES OF SAVORY DELICIOUSNESS. So easy, so quick. Soooo pleasing. Unless you have those TERRIBLE friends that are always like, “ewww I just can doooo mayonnaise it’s sooo bad for you wahhhh it’s sooo gross the texture freaks me outttttt wahhhhh wahhhh klhsdglkhsdlgkdshglkdshglsdkhgsdlkghsdlgkhsdg”. Like get over it. Or not. More for me and you.

Whoa egg pictures are pretty boring.

Random dog photo? That’s better.

Bacon Deviled Eggs 

(From June/July Issue of Fine Cooking)

  • 4 peeled hard-cooked large eggs
  • 3 Tbs. mayo
  • 1/2 tsp. Dijon mustard
  • 1 Tbs. finely chopped flat-leaf parsley
  • 2 slices of bacon, cooked and crumbled
  • Hot sauce, to taste
  • Kosher salt and fresh ground black pepper
  • Paprika for garnish

Slice the eggs in half lengthwise. Remove the yolks, transfer them to a small bowl, and mash them with the back of a spoon. Add the mayonnaise, Dijon mustard,  the parsley and hot sauce. Mash until smooth. Stir in the chopped/cooked bacon and season to taste with salt and pepper. Fill the egg whites (I use a pastry bag because I am so fucking fancy like that). Sprinkle with little pinches of paprika — smoked paprika if you can find it!

Double the recipe and pop the leftovers into your mouth for breakfast all week. Not that I did that. That’s gross.



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