Archive | August, 2011

tour party!

8 Aug

Sade so generously threw a tropical themed party for the entire crew of the tour. Started right after she got off stage and apparently went until 4 AM. What happened to me being able to hang out ANYWHERE until 4 aM or so? I…I just can’t anymore. This infuriates me.

It was hilarrrrrrious to see the crew…people we see every day in full on work-mode, let loose and wear grass skirts and coconuts.

But my personal favorite thing? Having an excuse to buy Pippa a hawaiian shirt. Puddy and his overweight self were stuck with the party favor lei and his bow tie. Always overdressed, that asshole.

annnnnd post party car ride….


6 Aug

That’s not nice, iPhone.

After planning what, in my head, was going to be an epic make-fun-of-Jersey-Shore-while-pretending-to-hate-it-and-yet-giving-it-the-ratings-it-thrives-on party, it turned out that we really weren’t in the mood to..well..have a party. Which is great because it seemed like Jersey Shore wasn’t in the mood to put on an entertaining season premiere episode.


Anyhow, one of the loves of my life, Melissa, came over with some insanely delicious gelato from Eataly and a bottle of Skinnygirl margarita, as “ron-ron” juice is just…how do I put this…fucking disgusting. Who knew that blended maraschino cherries, watermelon juice, cranberry juice and whatever trash one can find on the boardwalk of the jersey shore would be so icky? Certainly not I.

I started off the morning marinating bone-in chicken thighs and drums in the chipotle marinade….something I think I will make at every gathering I ever have. It bakes for a little over an hour (at 400F) and needs no babying whatsoever, so you are free to handle whatever else you need to do in the kitchen.

Then, after searching the internet and all my cookbooks for a flavorful and simple pasta salad, I decided to hit up twitter, where I was given the recommendation to make Ina Garten’s Orzo with Roasted Vegetables, which can be found here:

Now, I’ve never ever made anything with Orzo. I don’t know why not, really. It’s just not something I ever think about using. Anyhow, I’ll tell you this: there is about a 20 second time period where your orzo goes from perfectly cooked to slimy and soft. Also, I feel like Ina sabotaged me in a few ways with this recipe. Firstly, don’t peel the eggplant, like the recipe says. Hell, the eggplant isn’t even peeled in the alluring photo on the website. Dammit! You lose that wonderful purple color that would go perfectly in the final product. Also, some people in the comments said to cut back on the oil but I assumed that this was just to cut back on fat, so I just went with the recipe. But with 1/3 of a cup of olive oil (mine were a bit too small, though), your roasted veggies will come out soggy and sloppy. A ton of delicious flavor, but soggy. So yes. Cut back on the oil and definitely make those diced veggies at least an inch/1.25 inch thick so they won’t disappear into your orzo!

I also bought what appears to be a frat house ass paddle from ABC Home not too long ago, so I figured hey, why not put cheese on this fancy new ass paddle?

I bought 6 of those little clay heart dishes at ABC, and I use them for every garnish imaginable. Here, they’re used to hold honey, which I lovvvvve to drizzle over cheese (experiment, I like it over camembert) and stick it to a cracker or slice of french bread. It changes everything and I can’t really do cheese without it now…

And here. The finished dinner: chipotle baked chicken, burrata caprese (burrata cheese, sliced red onion, basil, olive oil and balsamic) and the (sorta overdone) orzo.

Don’t judge me! It was warm, ok?

Really happy with the meal. Everything went together really nicely, plus my friend Melissa has freaking hilarious commentary during Jersey Shore. Pretty much the perfect night.

Aaaah. My favorite part about cooking…

Cleared plates. Hooraaaaaaay!



petting zoo takes Chicago

6 Aug

Puddy looks like a giant, no?


Still sitting so, so oddly. I love it. Also will this thing ever grow some knees?

Swoon. You can barely tell she’s the devil.

chipotle marinade!!!!

6 Aug

chipotle baked thighs/drums from an earlier cooking night….

Why the exclamation points? BECAUSE I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS STUFF. Since discovering it, this is something I will never, ever NOT have in my freezer, stored in individual little baggies for multiple meals.

I dunno where this recipe originated, and I’m sure it’s nothing that special or too different from other chipotle marinades out there. The real amazingness about it is it’s simplicity and versatility AND OVERALL DELICIOUSNESS!

I contributed the recipe as a post to a verrrrry yummy website called Young, Married and Chic. You can find the recipe here and some photos from my first night making it. Oh heaven.

I pretty much ummmm….quadruple the recipe and even throw in what is pretty much 6 or 7 times the amount of garlic for an already quadrupled recipe. The key to this marinade is just tasting. It will be SPICY….if you don’t like spicy, more brown sugar! Still too hot? More garlic and ketchup! Too sweet now? More vodka! Love cilantro? Put some cilantro in that bitch! Aaah endless possibilities. I’m not sure where this recipe originally comes from, but my trainer gave it to me and I am forever grateful.

To make enough to save, I pour 4 cans which is usually around 12 peppers or so. From that, I pour in enough vodka to make it perfectly mushy even when frozen. Easy to scoop into a pot from the freezer bags, and mmmm flavor country. After making it so many times now, I’ve realized that measuring is overrated when it comes to this. As long as you use all the ingredients, you have a gold mine!

Look at this ridiculous elephant garlic banananess! The best use for this giant garlic is roasting it…it turns into a yummy paste for spreading on whatever you want (your body), but it is also great for the marinade. Peel 10 little cloves or a couple of these monsters! The flavor isn’t quite as strong, but it does jusssst fine. God I love garlic.

Bag into little baggies! I love sautéing shrimp with a few scoops of frozen marinade for lunch with a light salad to cool off that tongue. But you MUST bake chicken legs and bone-in thighs with this.

I gotta stop. I’m starving. And I know I have a ton of this in my freezer right now so I’ll be making home cured bacon and munching on chipotle shrimp as soooooon as I get home on monday….

Enjoy! xx

jerks and bacon.

6 Aug

Aaah so I am in one of my most favorite cities in the US of A, Chicago.

Lollapalooza is going on so the city is abuzz with people that I’m sure would be considered annoying to anyone that actually lives in Chicago….isn’t that how it always works? Anyhow, I don’t mind it, and since we are staying downtown, it makes for one of the more fun and exciting stops on the tour.

I will admit I was more than a bit bummed that my blog was kind of infiltrated by people who linked it from outside gossip sites (i can see where pretty much everrrryone comes from). Sites that already talk shit about out me, that call me a jobless tranny, my personal favorite. I said in a post that I like to cook for John because it is something I can really do for him since I can’t be equal to him financially….and that apparently just opened the doors to Assholia. No. I don’t have millions of dollars. They’re right. They got me there. But since I already said that part, it’s like they had to find other things to just completely dig at. “typical asian that gets with a man for money”. Typical asian? Jesus! What is wrong with people!

It’s really easy to say “just forget about them who cares they are jealous”. And I know everyone is just trying to help. I guess it is just something I will personally have to get over but I also think it’s okay to vent or be a little upset over it.

I know. Wah wah wah. It just sucked that even though I try my hardest not to ever know about what they say (people will tell me or link it to me even) those people still came here to say it.

Anyhow I really don’t want to drag on the sob story anymore, because it’s not one. I love my life and I am not complaining, please don’t think that….just venting. I just thought that I could have this and share things and share recipes and whatever random adventures I might encounter. And that few days of blocking and deleting comments sucked.

I cannot express how happy I am to read all yourrrrrr comments though, you know who you are. I really get happy when people share recipes or tell funny stories. I read everything and I guess that’s why I was so bummed….because this was making me so happy, then…WAH, jerk overload.

On a happier note, BACON!

My dad emailed me what seems to be….oh I don’t know…the most AMAZING DELICIOUS HOME CURED BACON EVER. My parents live in Thailand, and from the sounds of it, they have been making this delicious slab of pork belly for months now. I think I should call and check up on them more as their arteries are slowly clogging.

If you don’t AT LEAST click this link, you are bonkers.

I will be starting mine on monday. Would LOVVVVVVE if you guys did a bit of grocery shopping / killing innocent pigs and taking their bellies this weekend so we could start together….then all eat our delicious bacon the following Monday after the 7 days of curing. Oh it would make me so happy. Bacon party!

goooooooooooooood morning

4 Aug

Pesto eggs with mushrooms, and one delicious boyfriend.

I hear the men leaving now. Please don’t leave, I need you guys!

and oh…

3 Aug

I made breakfast this morning looking like this….

Sweet Cherry Skin Brightening Enzyme Peel. Let’s blame my egg mess-up on this flesh burning concoction.

Also yes. I realize it looks like feces.



3 Aug

So I made eggs this morning. But the whole thing was so easy that I’m even hesitant to post details on it. I feel like it would come off as me trying to give you this great new thing and you guys are gonna be like “um that’s stupid easy and not even exciting who does this bitch think she is?”.

Anyone who knows me knows that I enjoy creating negative scenarios in my head for seemingly positive situations.

Anyhoo, I am really big on making sure that people know they can cook. I cringe when I hear someone say “I can’t cook”. Why can’t you? You seriously cannot buy a pre-seasoned filet of catfish at whole foods for 4 dollars and throw it on some foil and bake it and cut some lettuce for a salad? Or you can’t measure ingredients and pour vinegars and sugars into a bowl, throw some meat in and pop it in the fridge where it sits for hours? Yes you can dammit!

I find…I dunno…great respect with people who cook even just a few meals a week. The simplest of meals. I love it when people share photos with me on twitter and I get to see that people are still home in this crazy world and enjoy something so simple. I dunno what it is. I just love it. I guess I have kind of a weird life and it provides comfort and makes me feel normal and stable.

I love the difference in photos between men and women who send me pictures of their creations. Men usually have an enormous slab of meat, on a paper plate, usually, and a hastily chopped potato. Women have plates with more greens than anything, and they’ve gone through the trouble to wipe down any random spots of sauce that doesn’t belong. The differences are cute, and I love it. It’s sexy when a man can cook, for sure. But I really do love the fact that I can cook for my man. It makes me feel good that I can do something for him when he does so much for me, things I could never reciprocate financially. I’m not trying to be all, “get in the kitchen, bitches!”, but I do love some good ol old-fashionedness when it comes to cooking — especially when cooking makes you happy too.

I have no way to transition this to my egg recipe but here!

And oh, on twitter , I did list this as “eggs over easy” but when life gives you broken yolks, make a scramble.

Egg Scramble with Arugula Pesto, Lemon Avocado and Maple Smoked Bacon

Mezzini Arugula Pesto…the key ingredient. I can really see myself using the crap out of this in life. SO much favor. A scoop over some hot, buttery, lemon spaghetti…on a piece of toasted french bread…mmmm….from whole foods. 5 bucks.

First you need that bacon grease. How else would you cook your eggs, silly? Normal oil? NOT WHEN THERE IS SUCH THING AS BACON GREASE!

Nothing in life excites me quite like using a new non-stick pan. Sorry, John.

Drain the bacon, leave a bitttt of bacon grease in the pan…

Scoop in a hearty spoonful of pesto…

On medium/low heat it will bubble and brown quickly so GET THE EGG IN THERE but don’t break it unless you want to be a failure and end up making a scramble like…

….this! just tossed 2 eggs into the pan and scrambled them with the bacon grease and pesto. Only takes a minute! I prefer closer to wet than dry. That’s what she said. Squirt some lemon on a halved avocado with salt and pepper and you have a very fulfilling and flavorful, quick breakfast.

Yes there is only one piece of bacon on my plate at the end. I am a firm believer in making extra bacon to eat while cooking. I can’t just have it staring at me while I’m trying to cook. Get in my mouth!!

And if you are wondering why I use avocado so much, it pretty much only has to do with the fact I cut carbs and, in breakfast, avocado replaces potatoes, hashbrowns, homefries, whatever for me. Something I miss every day. But it really is working, and I’ve grown to love love love avocado. Especially when you (correctly) make eggs over easy and rub the avocado all over the runny yolk oh baby.

Hope you try it! Please cook. It makes me happy when you cook.

Not feeling well….

2 Aug

But just bought enough groceries for an exciting week of cooking! Mainly, the Italian-themed night I am hosting for Jersey Shore premiere on Thursday. Totally gross, I know. But it is a GREAT excuse to have friends drunkenly ranting about JS and eating some delicious food that I’ve been itching to make. There should be some amazing small bites to share (and homemade ricotta stuffed into shells!)…can’t wait!

Getting a new camera as well….really wanna work on becoming an excellent food photographer. I actually hear there’s a class for this at some local culinary classes. Who knew!

So for now, check out life on the tour, for the pups. I could never buy them a toy that could compare to their love for an empty plastic water bottle. And they love them some hotel beds. Spoiled little shits. If I wasn’t me, I’d make fun of me.





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