Halcyon: Goddess of Mediocrates

Without a doubt, my favorite part about being on tour with John on the weekends is looking up and asking for great restaurants. We try to go for ones that kind of encapsulate the feeling of the city that we’re in, and since we have […]


Black Iron Burger Shop

Delicious. Just go. Or be a lazy asshat like me and order in. Although, they did forget my diet coke. I mean, how could they? I needed my DIET coke to take down my double cheesy patty melt with ketchup, mayo, mustard, onions, tomato and […]


dead legs

those back legs kill me. and yes, that’s pee.


Mango and cayenne pepper

My new favorite street snack. Make your own by….CUTTING A FUCKING MANGO AND PUTTING CAYENNE PEPPER ON IT. Jesus do I have to tell you guys everything?? xx  



Seriously. If you go to NYC and go to one of those giant, “hip” sushi places, you make me sad. Not mad. Just sad. I’ve been known to want to go to those big places from time to time….mainly Matsuri, but seriously…there is nothing. like. […]

(whisper) **hello?**

Pssst. Is anyone still here? Seriously. What just happened? Did I suddenly get a life or what?! I have been so terribly neglectful! I had kind of a crazy week in Miami debuting my…ahem…new swimsuit collaboration (i refuse to be the kind of person who […]



Being evil makes me tired too, Pippsqueak.



I was about to post one simple little recipe for sea salt chocolate chip cookies, but like that evil mary jane, sea salt chocolate chip cookies only seem to be a gateway drug, as I have found myself finding more and more delicious baked goods […]


morning bathtime!

No, not mine, pervos. She is the freaking best. Except when she is the fucking worst. I now understand how people say you can love something without liking it all the time. Good morning!


ok yes corn again.

I cannot get this recipe off my mind. Southern fried corn….WITH BACON GREASE. Recipe here.



Here’s another traumatizing experience for you…Whereas the last one came in the form of toffee, I have another one I can’t help but think about every time I think of peaches… I picked up a peach from Albertsons when I was about 15 or or […]


twix bar FAIL

What fun would this thing be if I only posted flawless, delicious recipes? Because for every 10 of those, there is 1 twix-bar monstrosity. Remember how under “sausage links”, I posted the links to two different homemade twix bar recipes, one more difficult than the […]


just the tip time

Wouldn’t that be a great Wheel of Fortune “before and after”? Just The Tip Time. Because guess what, it is tip time. I don’t even know why I feel like I am the authority on cooking and kitchen tips, I’m not, but I do fall […]


anti-theft lunch bags

I sometimes wish I had a normal 9-5 job, so I could have lunch breaks and better understand all the passive-aggressive letters in breakroom kitchens that I read on But since I don’t, does anyone have a use for these? And if you have […]


I just bought this…

…and I could not be more excited for its arrival! The All-Clad Indoor Electric Grill. Can you imagine all the wonderful things you can make on this puppy? Especially since summer is ending (I am such a pessimist) and those nice BBQ’s outside are gonna […]


Oh my! How did these get in here?


Meeeow. Baked cajun catfish.

Yes…still on this stupid diet which actually isn’t so stupid anymore since it’s actually working. I suppose it’s just stupid because I hate being the kind of person who has to say things like “instead of the potatoes, do you think you could bring me […]


Lemon Ice Cream Sandwiches with Blueberry Swirl

Does that title freaking KILL YOU or what??? Holy crap. I want to make these asap so I can eat a ton and have an intense, overwhelming feeling of regret causing me to cry into my hands for the remainder of the night and look […]


Corn / I hate titles.

I find that making a title for each blog post is the most difficult thing about the very simple thing that is “blogging”. For instance, this post’s general theme is corn but if I label it “Corn” it sounds like a chapter in a handwritten […]



Pretty much in love with this place, to the point that it actually pains me that it is so close to my apartment. Their brunch pizzas (basically an excuse to eat pizza, early) are ooey gooey and skeetworthy with sunny side eggs atop their crispy […]